Camel-Toe...its not just for the desert anymore.

So...
I've been hearing a lot about the objectification of women lately in the media.  I have a take on it that few of you are going to be happy about but I feel as an avid observer of the society around me it is time to vocalize my thoughts into a hopefully coherent, tasty little morsel for your brain to chew on for a while.

The media has been spewing forth more and more stories about the objectification of women in society.  I don't tune into mainstream media, so for this to have reached me means that this issue must be raging across the world like Godzilla on meth.  Now having listened repeatedly to how men are treating women as mere sexual playthings and how this line of thinking has to stop, I need to finally stand up and call out "BULLSHIT!" Having said that, let me clarify that I'm not saying that I condone masoginistic attitudes or any sort of behavior that takes power away from women.  As I have repeatedly stated in other blogs (See "Why I Will Never Put The Toilet Seat Down Again"), I have a daughter and I want her to grow up confident and strong in a world where gender equality is a real thing and she isn't being discriminated against in any way... but I also realize that my role as her parent, is to educate her to help her bring that change, and not to scream at the top of my lungs in every store that markets mini-skirts to 10 year olds, "MY DAUGHTER IS NOT A WHORE!!!"

Once again, men as a gender, are being singled out for not being able to control their instincts.  Now i'm not going to be so brazen as to hop on some moral soap-box and start preaching some conservative diatribe here, but what ever happened to discretion ladies?  I know...I know... the media,   the advertisers, society dictating it... I know.  I've heard it all before.  I'm talking about your own internal choices.  Lets put all of your insecurities and years of brainwashing that insist that you need to look a certain way aside for a moment and look at this issue from a logical, completely emotionless  perspective for a couple minutes.  I know its difficult but I promise you won't break a nail.

Tangental point : Isaac Newton's third law of physics states that "any action has an equal and opposite reaction".  Now remember this because there will be a quiz later.

Now lets get back to the surface here and discuss fashion, particularly women and girls fashion in this here American society.  FASHION RULES...and here we all thought for the longest time that it was the oil companies, banks, insurance companies, lobbyists, government and other major corporations that were the ones that had us by the short hairs... we were wrong.  If there has been an industry that has twisted society mentally and financially into knots it is fashion.  I can say without hesitancy that fashion has touched upon the vanities of every individual that I know in some way or on some level, at some point of their lives.  The nagging need to fit in, that makes you change your appearance so that at a glance you will appear more socially acceptable...Yeah I remember it...I rocked a mullet in the 80's...I know of which I speak.  I could barely keep my hands off of myself I was so damned sexy... not that I was really trying to.

So lets take a look at fashion and what society today deems socially acceptable.  The amount of accessories, surgery, form altering apparel, make-up, and body care products that flood the market in this here "free-world" is astounding.  I would venture a guess that there is a several billion dollar industry that is thriving off of the (mostly female) insecurities involved in attracting a mate and by participating in aforementioned  industry you are perpetuating (1) the myth that we are all supposed to look a certain way and (2) You need to deceive a potential mate into noticing you...thus starting every future relationship based on a lie.  And lets be serious about this...its mostly the ladies who are guilty of this.

Now I'm not saying that at no period in time has there never been the occasional sock stuffed in the trousers for false visual effect by NO man ever... but for the most part we stopped that shit in the 70's. If the objective is that you are going to be seeing it later on in the evening anyway we figured it wasn't best to embellish thus creating an awkward moment at game time. We adapted into a new game plan.  In this year of 2015 men are still doing what we have been doing for decades to attract ladies.  We'll maybe get a gym membership, a haircut, a shave and a vehicle that proportionally emphasizes the size of the dick that we wish we had.  Yeah we know it...and we own it ladies, but thats about the extent of it unless you include our participation in the thriving pharmaceutical industry that levels out the libido playing field amongst men so that now I have to sword-fight every polyester-clad, antique, trouser-tent that has popped a little blue pill. To them I have to say...YOU WERE OUT OF THE GAME COMPLETELY LIKE 30 YEARS AGO!!!! NOW I HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU TRY AND OUT-CHARM MY GIRL-FRIENDS PANTS OFF?!?!?!?  YOU ARE LIKE 92 YEARS OLD!!!! THIS GIRL WOULD TEAR YOU IN HALF OLD MAN!!!  TURN THAT THING OVER TO THE ASTROGLIDE AND PACHOULI-SCENTED COUGAR SECTION IN THE CORNER THEN COME BACK HERE IN 4-6 HOURS SO I CAN KICK YOUR ASS WITHOUT THINKING YOU ARE ENJOYING IT!!!!

Sorry...where was I?  Oh yeah...So men take up a fairly small percentage of the whole when it comes to fashion or the" industry that feeds off of our souls".  A truly fashionable man who grooms himself incessantly and is never donning anything less than spectacular is either dressed by his mate  (stay tuned for future blog: Men who are so pussy whipped that they dress in matching outfits an ride on tandem bikes and my justifications for running them of hey road.)  or most likely gay and is therefore out of your breeding pool anyway.  So my point is that hetero men don't occupy much space in the fashion industry and since the vast majority of us don't give don't give a flying-fuck about it, we don't need to have our egos stroked incessantly every time we leave the house by throngs of random strangers.  It is a pain in the ass to have to deal with people interrupting the flow of your day to try and win your attention.  The funny thing is ...that most men realize that the less we care about what women look like the more they want us to notice them.  We clearly don't create fashion so therefore are not responsible for the vast amount of fashion issues taking place today...only for its subsequent effects of how we sometimes respond to the jaw-droppingly overt attempts to gain our attention.

SO...lets break down a few of the issues with fashion today that pertain directly to men objectifying women:

PADDED OR FORM ALTERING UNDERGARMENTS

This is just ridiculous...we are going to find out eventually.  Thats the whole point.  Nothing says "I'm out for a one-night-stand" more than a padded push-up bra.  Yup..from 13-96 everyone can have tits like a 25 year old and guess what ladies???  When you put them in our face... WE NOTICE.  So does every other man in the room.  Thats why you are wearing it!!! But the whole principle here is to get people to notice you for a body feature that is basically a lie. You know it, but still use it to gain to attention you so desperately seek on a daily basis. That's kind of sad isn't it?

FORM ENHANCING YOGA PANTS

Clearly you don't all do yoga and aren't in the Tour de France so what the fuck???  I'm getting a little tired of admiring the ass crack of yoga pant clad, flourescent-thonged geriatrics walking ahead of me on the sidewalk or the horrifyingly-pedaphilic feeling of checking someone out and realizing "that girl is like 13 years old".  Either way I feel shame.  So at least half of the the females wearing these prosthetics (and yes I call wrapping yourself in elastic a prosthetic) are doing so to get honest heterosexual men to loathe themselves several times on a daily basis.  I have gotten to the point that I refuse to even look down at anybody wearing yoga pants or spandex for that matter.  I've been let down too many times. the worst by far is the woman who can't even fill them out and the elastic sags down like the jowls of a sad old hound dog.  I won't even go into the opposite end of that spectrum that makes me wonder if I can actually hear the fabric straining to contain what you shoehorned into it.  But for the most part it looks like you painted fabric on your body. If I can tell the length of your clitoris or what kind of pubic hairstyle you are sporting then guess what??  You need to put some more fucking clothes on not to be objectified.  There is clearly no discretion on your part but you are demanding discretion on a mans part when we see what looks like an endless burlesque show walk past us???  You are fucking with our instincts now!  Would you like us to sneeze with our eyes open too?

ACCESSORIES
From make-up to fake implants to plastic nipples that make you look like you have been standing in the frozen food section for the last half hour, its all a ruse to get men to act on their instincts and then shame them for doing so. Why has this deception become so accepted as commonplace in the beginning of a relationship?  Am I supposed to respect someone who has done their best to trick me into thinking that they are someone they aren't?

SO... in today's society where its just as commonplace to for me to see some geriatrics perky new tits standing up and thrust in my face (when a year ago they were being tucked into a belt) as waking up next to a seemingly perfect stranger who is laying on a pillow that looks as though it spent the night wrestling with three clowns, I'm now, not supposed to treat people in the manner that they portray themselves.

What you call objectification I call honesty.  There is a difference between being called out on something and being attacked.  One of those things is actually justified and just because you can't handle the reaction to your action, doesn't mean it isn't justified. Don't bitch at us for looking at you in the manner that you have gone out of your way to portray yourself as.. I've heard the argument... "a woman should be able to wear whatever she wants whenever she wants".  And to that I would say yes that is true...I agree.  But if you dress as though you are looking for sex then you are inviting people to look at you in that manner.  ALL OF THEM, NOT JUST THE CUTE ONE AT THE END OF THE BAR.  Some women feed off exposing themselves to everybody.  Thats fine, they own it. They are at least in touch with their need to be ogled by many.  More power to them (A) because they don't discriminate against those who look at them and (B) because they clearly have bigger issues to deal with.
There is a reason that hookers dress a certain way.  I'd like to see a study done over the past 20 years regarding fashion trends vs. prostitution unemployment rates. I would think that the confusion alone would have fucked up those numbers.
 I know also that any exotic dancers that I have befriended throughout my life have a distinctly different wardrobe in public than at work.  They don't want or need to draw that much attention to themselves when they aren't working, because they understand the art of seduction, the power they wield, and the ripple effect that their daily wardrobe has on the general populous. So if you want all of this respect that you claim to deserve, than act like it.  I wouldn't expect to be treated with respect if I walked into a business meeting with my dick hanging out.  So don't expect to gain respect or non-objectification  when your tits are bursting over your blouse or I can tell what color underwear you are wearing within 30 seconds of you walking into a room. Guess what?? There is a reason that you don't know the color of mine...because I haven't shown you... that I'm not wearing any.

Now let me sum this up by saying that to those of you who can consciously admit to yourself that you fall into the category of using your sexuality to navigate your way through life, don't get pissed that its working but you can't control who it works on.   Men are tired of being set up to take the fall for the issues of women who don't realize that its way sexier to make us notice your personality and leave a little to the imagination.  To You women I say quit your bitching about it or (and I never thought I would say this) put some fucking clothes on and maybe you won't have these issues.